This story is more for my memory than for sharing. Because let’s be honest, probably only about 5 people actually care about this detail!
October 24, 2012 is a day that will hold so many treasures in my heart. It was the day I got those 2 lines on that expensive test!
Let me back up a bit though…
Mike and I had been having “conversations” about what would happen when my prescription ran out at the end of September. He was adamant that I would have to go to the free clinic and get it renewed. And I was adamant that if I did that, I’d never have children. Dramatic much? Since we didn't have insurance and were basically tied up with work until 5 pm everyday, options were very slim. I let go of the issue in August when I got my teaching job. It was just an issue that I felt like I was getting nowhere with and didn't want it causing issues in my marriage. It was brought up again when we had coffee with our pastor and his wife on Wednesday, September 12, 2012. They advised us not to start a new prescription but to stop taking it when it ran out to let my body regulate & get the toxins from the pill out. I could tell by Mike’s face, that at first, he was not thrilled about this advice. But the more we talked about it, the more he became more at ease. Until we got home that night and I was all “ok, I’m throwing it away. all done. goodbye pill".” Yea, that didn't go over well since I still had a week of pills left. I got the look of annoyance and took my pill that night.
The next night, I was about to take it & Mike said throw it away. So I threw it away without taking one. Who am I to argue what the hubby says? That was Thursday, September 13. I began reading up the next day on how my body would react to not having those hormone regulators anymore. Websites were saying it could take months for me to get anything and even then it would be completely irregular.
Wrong for them. Monday, September 17 I had major cramps and AF came. It was right on track with when I should have had it as if my body were still on the pill. I didn’t think anything of it, just that I was a lucky one who was going to keep right on with a regular schedule!
About 2 weeks later I started getting crazy headaches. Ones that made me sit down and catch my breathe. I just summed them up to exhaustion & my body regulating. Then I started getting hot. ALL the live-long time. I could not cool myself down. Again, just thought it had to do with my body regulating. October 15 came and went. AF did not come. I refused to let myself get excited about it. Just thought that I was not going to be the lucky one with a normal schedule right away anymore. I started to get winded easily & wanting to take naps all day long. I would get in the car after work & pass right out. A few more days went by and I told Mike that I was late. He laughed at me and just said “Whoa, none of that means baby.” Then the cramping came. I figured I’d start anytime since I was having cramps.
By this point a few of our really close friends knew what was going on. Mike had told me that after a month of nothing, he’d be open to taking a test. But my friend Sara couldn’t wait that long. She brought me 2 tests to our league volleyball game on Tuesday, October 23. She told me I had to take them because she couldn’t handle the suspense anymore.
So Wednesday, October 24 I woke up. Peed on that stick. And then sat on the bathroom floor and prayed. I asked God for His will to be done. Of course I wanted that stick to have 2 lines, but I knew that I didn’t want my life running on my timeline. After the longest 3 minutes of my life, I stood up and looked. 2 LINES!!!!!!! 2 LINES!!! I shed a quick tear and then walked into the bedroom. Mike was doing his devotions and looked up at me. I wish I would have said something much cuter than “Um babe, there’s 2 lines which means pregnant.” He grabbed the test to look at it & then gave me a big kiss! And because I’m married to a funny guy, he goes “Wanna make out now?” Yes, sweet baby, your daddy wanted to smooch your mama like crazy the day he found out you were in my belly. Then of course, typical Mike he said “don’t they say to take 2 tests to be sure? so tomorrow you’re taking the second one.” Ha ok babe, whatever you say.
I went through that day seriously walking on a cloud. Smiles from ear to ear.
The day we found out. Sitting in the car waiting for Mike after work. Completely shocked and excited!
The next morning I woke up & did the same routine. After 3 minutes, I saw 2 lines again. This time when I told Mike he simply said “Wow", we’re having a baby!”
Because we didn’t have insurance, I had to wait until 15 weeks to actually confirm there was a little bambino growing inside me. Mike & I decided we were going to keep it to ourselves for awhile. Well ok I actually decided it. We told our close family & friends, but not many people beyond that.
It’s so crazy the emotions you experience when you see 2 lines or the word pregnant. I can’t even explain & I don’t think I ever will be able to. The joy and fear all mixed into one.
We know that this is the plan God has for us. Simply because we were not anticipating a baby to come so soon since we certainly don’t feel at all financially ready.
So for you mama’s who are going off the pill, trust in His timing. It may be immediate or it may be months, years. But know, that God has a plan for you. He already has your story written. Don’t make your life about your wants & needs. Make it about seeking after Him.